That if by chance it be shaken, or into its depths like a pebble
Drops some careless word, it overflows, and its secret,
Spilt on the ground like water, can never be gathered together”

This is another hard thing about being a mom: babies pick up on your emotions.
I've had an emotional week, I've been making some changes in my priorities and have met with some resistance from outside. One day my heart was hurting, and I sat with Maeve trying to read her one of her books. I was crying and reading to her at the same time, and after a few pages, I could tell she knew something wasn't right.
Sometimes when I cry, she just starts crying, too, which cures me pretty fast, because it makes me laugh that she's sympathy crying for my sake. This time she just wandered off to let me deal with my issues, so I quickly blew my nose and got it together.
It's not that I don't want to show emotion in front of her, I don't mind her seeing me cry. At least she's young enough not to want to play Twenty Questions with me about it, as I'm sure she will by this time next year. I just don't want to upset her unnecessarily. She's got enough to worry about between teething and not tripping on things without worrying about what strangeness is going on with Momma.
The best part is that she helps me turn my feelings around, either by having some terrible crisis of her own (like falling over) or by making me laugh as she gives me some of her teether to chew on. Maybe she thought I was crying because my teeth hurt, too.
You just can't be sad with this face looking up at you! |
I think it's sweet that she tries to cheer you up in her own little way; I hope things improve soon for you. If you ever want to talk about it, just shoot me an email. Us mamas have to stick together!
ReplyDeleteThanks, L, I appreciate that. :)
ReplyDeleteI second L's comment - one of the great things about mommy blogs is that is helps us to realize that we all go through these periods (for me, it's like every other day). Stay true to yourself and your needs. The outside resistance will adjust.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you!